Antjie

Antjie

Wednesday 22 October 2014

Everyone has secrets.


Everyone has secrets. 
But this girl has darker secrets.
Hiding in the depths of her heart.
They are killing her. (Secretly)
Don't tell. 

There are childish secrets. 
Janet likes Avery.
Amanda is getting a new phone. 
A secret birthday party. 
Don't tell.

There are adult secrets. 
When they are alone.
And the door is closed.
They do things.
I opened the door once. 
Don't tell.

Then there are my secrets.
Different somehow. 
A boy who broke my heart. 
Not broke, but completely destroyed it. 
A friend who abandoned me. 
For the girl who had nicer things. 
A father who yells in my face. 
I can't do anything right.
Don't tell. 

And when the pain gets so bad.
From keeping the secrets locked away 
I take a piece of sharp metal. 
I write on my arm. 
Because it must me my fault somehow.
Everything is my fault... That's what they told me. 
And suddenly the secrets don't hurt anymore.
I keep writing. 

I will never tell.